A morning thought

Dear diary,

Honestly, I want to whine about my research, fed up with it

Honestly, I want to whine why my scholarship hasn’t came yet

Honestly, I want to whine about the wheather. When the sun will shine?

Honestly, I want to whine I feel homesick so much

Honestly, I want to whine how awkward the people here

But…

I realize I don’t have right to whine so much, those things above are NOTHING compared to the suffering of my brothers and sisters in Indonesia

whose home wipe away by tsunami and Mt. Merapi Eruption

whose relatives passed away because those teribble disasters

who doesn’t have anything to wear, to eat

who crying all night, expecting someone will help them surviving cold night without roof and blanket

I feel ashamed

Just because my research doesn’t go well, my scholarship hasn’t come, and yes it’s very cold here, but I’ve got a room with heater and warm blanket, and yes people here is very cold, but I still have my family, friends, and boyfriend who I could lean on.

So, I don’t have a right at all to whining, fed up, or blaming anything why I’m here.

I don’t have a right at all…

I feel stupid for those days before…

Ya Allah, I’m sorry for being so selfish, for being so ungrateful for everything You gave to me, for being so childish.

Ya Allah, please give my brothers and sisters in Indonesia Your strength to go through this suffering time. Please save Indonesia and forgive us who always neglect Your warning and so ungrateful for Your blessing.

Then which blessing of your Lord will you deny? (Ar-Rahman)

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